Say...Uh...Ya Wanna Get Married?!?!?

First I would like to apologize for all the words that were not spelled correctly in the last post...I know that if CP read it she probably wanted to beat my head in by the end of it!

Ok, so that isn't exactly how it came to the point of Michael and I getting married.  In fact the proposal came three times over the last year and a half and I always said no.  I didn't say no because I didn't love him I said no because I was a selfish person who wanted a big gigantic diamond on my finger. 

Let me explain...I will wear clothes from wal-mart and target and not think twice about my jeans costing $20 instead of $120.  I don't have to buy name brand groceries and I don't need name brand anything really.  The nicest thing I owned until my Toyota was my Aggie Ring.  Not kidding!   BUT, the one thing that I have always been materialistic about is the engagement ring that I would one day wear.  I promised myself that I would not get married until I had the ring that I wanted. 

Getting pregnant changed that.  It didn't change my thinking in that I had to get married because I was pregnant it changed my thinking in that my priorities had to be realigned and I needed to realize what was important and a big fat diamond was not important. 

Remember that party I talked about for my grandfather?  We were in San Antonio and after talking to mom and Sarah on our girls trip to San Antonio we started talking about marriage and why I have never said yes to Michael and it occurred to me that I was completely stupid and that there was a man that loved me unconditionally and I refused to commit myself to him because I wanted a ring that I know we would never be able to afford?  Well it turns out I got both.  I married my best friend and I got the huge diamond that I wanted.

So I called him and asked..."hey seriously, you want to get married next Friday?"  He said yes of course with some hesitation about why I changed my mind so quickly.  See...I didn't want to get married after finding out I was pregnant because I didn't want people to think that I the only reason that I was getting married was because I was pregnant.  That is what I told my Tia and that is what I told my cousin.  I had several conversations with people about not wanting to get married because of the baby. But then being surrounded by my family and not being with Michael at the family event made me want to marry him so much more.

Friday we say yes, Saturday we choose a Dress...

We walked into Davids Bridal looking for a dress...I don't even look because the bridal consultant is asking me 1000 questions that really do not pertain to me or my situation but I sit there and answer them.  Taylor has cut her toe, Carly is chilling out in her carseat and Sarah has chosen 2 dresses.  All of this in 5 minutes.  They whisk me away to a dressing room, put my name inside of a heart on the door and now I am a bride.  All a bit cheesy if you ask me.  I try on the first dress.  Fits perfectly I love it and am ready to walk out the door with it.  Sarah of course wanted to see the second dress so I put it on and it doesn't fit and is hideous.

Thought for the moment...if this wasn't supposed to happen this way I wouldn't have found a dress.

My favorite moment of the week, as much as I didn't want to prance around in my dress was showing my grandpa me in my wedding dress.  Grandpa wasn't doing to well and I knew that he would not be able to make it to the wedding so being able to wear my wedding dress in front of him was almost as good as him being at my wedding.  There are 3 things that I wanted to accomplish before my grandfather is no longer with us and I have now accomplished 2 of them and as soon as Madison arrives the third will be complete.  He attended my college graduation, I got married (he saw me in my dress) and I want him to see his great-grandbaby.  My heart will runneth over when I can succeed with the third.

The wedding I was told was classic and graceful.  The only two people I have to thank for it is my awesome sister and my amazing mother.  Without their help that week the wedding would have been a disaster.

Wedding Tips 101

If your on a budget...
1.  Buy your flowers from Sam's and watch a video on youtube to make your bouquets.
2.  Make your own grooms cake...it was made with love and it was awesome!
3.  The cakes from HEB really aren't all that bad.
4.  Hire Charly Stagg Photography as your photographer...I didn't and learned my lesson the hard way.
5.  Don't wear Tuxes....I had an evening wedding and my men looked just as classy in a tie.
6.  Use your resources...
7.  Hobby Lobby will take anything back...seriously...anything ;) Wink Wink!
8.  Charles and Sues will do your updos for $25 bucks and I think my hair looked amazing.

The day of the wedding came and went in a blur...not kidding.  I as well as everyone else were running around with our heads cut off.  Its 7pm and its time to start.  I walk in escorted by the best step-father a girl could have to Charlotte Church singing The Prayer.  I was blessed to have my 4 best friends from Tyler come and watch me get married and even more blessed by the friends and family, some I havent seen in years be at my wedding with such short notice.  I am a very lucky girl and writing about my wedding day reminds me of this.

I never cried during the wedding and in fact my main goal was to keep Michael smiling so he wouldn't cry as well.  He hates that people would think that he would cry.  The look on his face when I was walking down the aisle is one that is burned on my heart forever.  If I ever doubt his love for me or his family all I will ever have to do is remember this very moment and I should forever be at peace.

Marriage is a good thing.  This might be a skewed view and might not come across how I want it to but I like being needed by someone other than myself.  I like knowing that I have a job (wife) for the rest of my life taking care of this other person.  I love knowing that I am loved enough to know that he would want to spend the rest of his life with me.

So no, I didn't get married because I was pregnant.  I got married because I wanted to.  I got married because I found the one man that loves me the way that I was meant to be loved and that God wanted me to be loved.  I got married because I love this man in a way that is indescribable in words....something that only he and I comprehend.

And that ladies and gents is how Michael and I got hitched one hot day in July and how we started the new chapter of our chaging world!

Stay tuned for the next installment of our family of 3...A fast review of the last 3 months leading up to the first day of required bed rest!

Telling the Family

Not so exciting but essential in the discovery of Madison Grace....

Oh the family...

I would be lying if I said I wasn't jealous of all the attention my sister got when she was pregnant and had Ms. Carly. 

The first family I decided to tell were my grandparents.  My grandfather was having his big 8-0 birthday party and I wanted to wait until after the party as to not take away from him and this giant milestone.  Well with all the facebook posts and the secrets some of my aunts wanted to know if Sarah was pregnant so I had to tell my family.  I didn't want to tell anyone in my family until I told my grandparents.  So I called and talked to Tia.  I told her I was pregnant and that I wanted to tell her and grandpa before telling the rest of the family.  She told me that grandpa was unavailable but she would tell him and that she was happy and excited for me and how it was a blessing from God.  She asked if Michael and I had talked about marriage but that is a different blog post so stay tuned...other than that I felt relief for not being judged.  Don't ask my why I thought I would be judged but a big feeling of relief came over me and I knew that everything would be ok.

Oh the Aunties...

The aunties were and are still in love with my two neices and would it be the same with me is all I could think about.  They already were getting excited about Sarah being pregnant again or Sarah winning a trip or or or...it was time to break the news.   As hard as I am trying to remember what the converstations were,  for the life of me I can't remember what was said.  I do remember my cousin asking if we were going to get married now...ummmm again this will be a different blog post...I do know that they were/are super excited about welcoming another great neice into the family and I am sure that once they meet Madison Grace they will love her as much as they love Taylor and Carly.

Telling Michael's Family...

We called Michael's kids the night we found out 100% I was pregnant to tell them.  They never answered the phone and have never answered the phone still to this day.  So his children had to find out through Myspace and Facebook.  This is horrible but it's what happened and to this day I am saddened that we were not able to tell them personally.  Michael has never been close to his mom or dad  but since finding out about the baby the relationships that have been forming are truely a work of God and I am thankful that I could help heal those realtionships.

Stay tuned for the next installment of our changing world....

Surprise!!!! You're Pregnant

This is a story of a guy and girl who had a baby girl that changed their whole world...

Surprise, you're 16 weeks pregnant!  Ummm...come again?  I didn't exactly find out that I was pregnant by my doctor.  Matter of fact the only reason I found out I was pregnant was because Michael and I were at Wal-Mart and on a whim I decided to buy a pregnancy test. 

Some History:

I was told that it would be very difficult to get pregnant if I could at all because I was diagnosed with PCOS in 2007.  I have never been a "normal" female who had the blessings of having what I needed to get pregnant and then with PCOS on top of it I knew it would be impossible to get pregnant. 

Getting back on target...I bought a 3-pack pregnancy test thinking I could save the other two for another time that I just had to find out if I was pregnant.  I completed the test on the afternoon of June 12th and oh crap there are 2 lines.  I take a picture and send it to mom and Sarah.  At this point I am shaking...thinking oh shit...Sarah calls right away excited as ever and crying because she is so excited.  Mom on the other hand text messages me and says exactly what I am thinking...Oh Shit!  They both tell me to wait to take another test in the morning because that is when the pregnancy hormones are the highest.  Well did I listen no.  I took another test that night and surprise it was still positive!  Oh Shit!  I finally wait and take the 3rd test on the morning of the 13th and of course it was positive.  Now to tell Michael...

Michael, love him don't think I could possibly ever love another man as much as I love this man.  Also don't think another man could love me the way that he loves me.  Of course it hasn't always been like that and everyone that is married and/or in a committed relationship knows that it's not always roses with your mate.  That being said we had already decided we did not want to have kids that our life was good the way that it was and we were going to be selfish with our lives and live the way we wanted.  It also helped that Michael already had 2 kids from a previous marriage and that I was a teacher who had plenty of kids on a daily basis.

Again off on a tangent.  I was scared to death to tell Michael that I was pregnant because I did not know what he would say or how he would react.  Let's just say it went better than I thought it would as in he wasn't mad but he wasn't excited either.  I think we were both very overwhelmed and I see now his reaction was exactly my reaction the day before.  I just had a day to take it all in.

Monday morning I called my girlie doctor and scheduled an appointment after giving them all the information from the weekend.  I went in Monday afternoon and they took blood and was told that they would call me with the results.  Having to wait on  that call was torture.  Seriously, I am not a patient person and now I am waiting to find out if in fact there is something growing inside of me?  The call came the next day in the middle of teaching summer school and in fact I was pregnant.  Oh Shit!  They scheduled an appointment for an ultrasound that afternoon to see how far along I was.

Trudging to the 6th floor of the Olympic Center to see Dr. Puttman was a very lonely and confusing walk.  I walk into the office and all I see are baby bumps...really?!?!? Is that really going to be me?!?!? I am only a kid...I can't be pregnant.  There are times that I still do not feel like an adult but I really didn't feel like an adult at this point and now I'm having a baby?  All I could think of was I'm the kid having a kid that everyone talks about.  Oh, Wait...I'm 30. 

"Ms. Hiney come on back.  I need you to pee in this cup so I can check your proteins".  Check my what?  I eat lots of protein isn't that a good thing?  Talk about peeing in a cup...this is something that I believe pregnant women become professionals at by the time that the baby is born.  Seriously I can pee in a cup perfectly, wash my hands and get out of the bathroom in less than a minute now.  Now, I've never timed myself but it's pretty fast.

Pregnancy excitement...walking into the ultrasound room was even more uncomfortable then walking into the doctor's office at all.  Please pull down your pants and this gel will be a little cold.  Ummm...there's a whole baby in there.  Not a bean, not a squash a whole baby. 

After measuring everything she is measuring 16 weeks.  16 what?!?!? Your telling me I am 4 months pregnant without knowing I was pregnant?!?!? Oh Shit... I would be the one mother on the face of the planet that would miss the whole first trimester of her pregnancy.  Ms. Hiney your due date is December 1st and you conceived on March 10th.  All I could think about at this point was I ruined Thanksgiving...I can't travel to California when I am 9 months pregnant.

Cry, Call Michael, Cry, Call Mom, Cry, Call Sarah, Cry....did I mention that I cried a lot that day? 

Reactions from everybody were amazing and positive and I was the only one being negative about it.  My favorite reaction came from a dear friend and I think it deserves being mentioned in this memory.  I walk into this friend's office knowing that I wanted her to be the next to know how far along I was and again the words oh shit came out.  Besides that the next words that came out of her mouth were priceless.  "Jennifer, you're gonna be on that TV show where they poop out a baby."  Loved it and love her and for the first time I laughed about being pregnant. 

Finding out I was pregnant and having a baby with Michael is a blessing and a miracle even though I didn't see or notice it at the beginning.  I now just had/have to learn to live for me, my husband and my baby instead of living for everybody and everything else.  Stay tuned for updates of our changing world!